The need for the grieving process
Letting go and moving on is very crucial. Most of the times people are advised against grieving and being sad whey are going through a period of losses. A period of losses is a very painful period that needs to be carefully attended to. Many times people are told to just forget and move on. It’s not that easy.
People need to go through the grieving process. People need to express and deal with their pains and losses in a constructive way. Losses need to be attended to. Losses needs to be managed. Have you ever kept something in a certain place for a long time without checking it? What does it do? It begins to stink. That is why products have expiry dates.
The expiry date is a warning system to a person concerning a product. Should you consume a product whom its expiry date has passed, you might get sick and sometimes you might die. So it is important to check the product for the expiry for the sake of your health and well being.
A can of worms
Bottling things births depression. People are depressed today because they bottle things. That is why men were also told that they must not cry. “Men are supposed to be strong”. “A man’s strength is in his silence”. When it’s sore it’s sore. When it’s painful, it’s painful. What you don’t deal with will deal with you.
The pain will eat you inside like a worm. People who deal with things head on are the happiest. These are the people who knows what it means to be free. Freedom can also come through dealing with things.
Man abuse women today because of the issues they haven’t dealt with. They are forced to manifest the pain within them by doing all sorts of painful things to women. The same can be said about women.
They do all sorts of things to men because of what they have not dealt with. When you have not healed, you will take that to other people. Hurt people hurt other people because every garbage must go somewhere. Remember the fact that every garbage has a bin.
People should not be a place where we throw our garbage to. A garbage must go to the dustbin where it belongs. Unattended things become a garbage.
They end up stinking. Every bottled thing will stink and cause one to stumble in life. Every loss must be dealt with accordingly. Every issue needs to be addressed.
Take out the garbage
You take out a garbage in your house right? Why do you take it out? You take it out because you don’t want your house or your room to smell bad right? Yes.
Even in your own life, take out the garbage before it causes your life to stink. If one room is stinking, the entire house will eventually stink. Take out the garbage.
That’s what you are doing when you are not dealing with your losses. Losses causes pains and instead of people dealing with this pain, they bottle it and starts inviting worms. This worms will then eat you inside slowly but surely.
All of a sudden a person is dead or has committed suicide. Learn to deal with your losses before they cause so much harm. Luckily today we are dealing with how you can navigate through your losses and manage them better.
Therefore, I encourage you to attend to your losses. Process them and deal with them. Be sad. Grieve over them. Don’t leave them unattended therefore. Jump into the grieve process and you will jump back into the normal life much sooner.
So how can one let go and move on? Today we are presenting to you the 5 baby steps of letting go and moving on. What are these steps? The 5 baby steps for letting go and moving on are:
The 5 baby steps to letting go and moving on
Step 1: Identify the loss
You need to first identify the loss. What type of a loss are you involved with? It is important to know. You can’t deal with what you don’t know. The awareness is very key therefore. After you have understood the nature of the loss, you are very much ready to move to the next step. Know and understand the loss(s). First know your enemy before you can deal with it. Ready for the second step? Let’s go.
Step 2: Assess the impact of the loss
What impact does this loss have on your life? Is it a big or smaller impact? The smaller the impact, the better in terms of dealing with it. The same cannot be said about the bigger impact. Some losses can really take you out while others can do a minor harm but the main thing is to attend to the loss so that you can deal with it severely. After you have assessed the impact of the loss, you are then ready for the next step. Are you ready? Let’s go,
Step 3: Creative a receptive environment
Learn to set aside some few minutes to be alone. Alone time is very good more especially if you are going through a grieving period. Be alone for once and walk through your emotions. You will need this ultimate silence in order to heal correctly. Isolate yourself to a more comfortable environment that works for you.
An alone time will help you a lot when you are going through the grieving moments. Got that? If you got it, let’s go to the next step of letting go and moving on. Let’s go.
Step 4: Allow the sad feelings and tears
Allow the sad feelings and tears. Cry if you have to. This is the moment to do so. Don’t act tough. Don’t try to be strong. You are a human being. Exercise that and cry. When you get burned on the stove, you feel a pain because you are a human being.
Your flesh responds to the fire by you feeling the pain. I love little children because they cry when they are going through it all.
Adults just want to be tough. When people are acting tough, they tend to bottle up things. They keep things within themselves and end up having depression and panic attacks. There is a reason you have tears. Cry if you can. Tears are one of the major ways for expressing pain. Release that pain through tears, whether you are a man or a woman.
This is easy for women but very tough for men because men were taught that a real man does not cry. Take a moment and cry and see if you will not feel better afterwards. You will really feel light. You will feel like some load was taken off your shoulders. Once again, allow sad feelings and tears. Process those said feelings by crying. Express and release those sad feelings through crying. You will really feel better from now on. Are you ready for the last step? Let’s go if you are ready.
Step 5: Learn the lesson
Reflect on what you have learned from the loss and move on. Have you learnt anything from the loss? Each and every loss has a purpose and a lesson. You don’t just loose. What did you learn from it all? If you have learnt the lessons from the loss, you are ready to move on.
Also don’t condemn yourself for your mistakes. Mistakes are a major part of life. We were designed to learn through the mistakes. Don’t feel bad as you go through the mistakes. You are learning.Mistakes are a major part of life. What is important is that you are learning all the relevant lessons involved. Life is all about lessons by the way. Learn from the loss and move on.
Your losses will only benefit you if you learn from them. A bonus point, what can you do with your loss? What can you do with your pain? Find what can you do and move on. Benefit from your losses. Don’t therefore lose for nothing. Turn your losses into gains.
Conclusion
We have come to the end of our story for today. I hope you have learnt all there is to learn in letting go and moving on from your losses and pains. I hope you will emerge victorious against all your losses and pain.
Never ever bottle up things and express your pain through tears. Crying is a natural event. Don’t be ashamed of it but learn to embrace it as a powerful tool of expressing your pain. Whether you are a man or a woman, cry when you are going through it.
We have established the steps of letting go and moving on. Let’s recap, what are these steps again? The 5 steps to letting go and moving on are:
- Identify your loss;
- Assess the impact of the loss;
- Create a receptive environment;
- Allow the sad feelings and tears;
- Learn the lessons
I hope you got it all. After implementing all the necessary steps, that pain will no longer be your portion. Till we meet again in the next piece. Peace.
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